Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Gotta love the heart... (Written 8-17-2010)

Today, I went on a hike up to Half Dome. All the flipping way up to the top.

And today, me and God had some good heart to heart thoughts. I remember one of my first camping experiences and we were hiking and on our way to go fishing. We had to go down a somewhat steep rock and I remember my dad telling us to “trust our feet”. That phrase has grown with me ever since, and today, God brought it up again.

As soon as I remembered, “Trust your feet.”, God told me, “Trust your heart.” So I walked and I thought with God.

It’s been awhile since I’ve felt anything from God. There’s been massive amounts of frustration on my end for it, too. There’s nothing like loving God, but feeling like He’s not saying anything to you. Really, it’s utterly irritating, but whatever.

And it’s been a long while since I’ve really been to church. I mean, I’ve visited a few here and there, but my heart has never clicked in any but one, this year, and it’s five hours north. Instead, my heart has clicked with people and I’ve put a lot of focus into friendship. It’s been a beautiful experience of learning to let go and just be.

It’s been awhile since I’ve read my Bible. It’s a sword, a weapon, a love story, wisdom, and knowledge. I know this. I love the Word and all it has brought me over the years, but this year, I’ve hardly touched it. I can’t. I try, and every once in a while, I’ll finally be able to sink my heart into its goodness and revel in awe, but for the most part, I just walk away frustrated. But something in me is changing and I have a feeling I’ll be seeing things a little differently soon.

Now, I’m not saying don’t go to church and don’t read your Bible. This is just the “journey” (as much as I hate that freaking word) I’m on. I’m just doing what my heart says to.

“Trust your heart.”

It’s not the first time I’ve heard this. It most likely won’t be the last, but there’s always something different going on in me when it is brought up. I’m finding that God lives even more out of the box than I imagined. He’s not angry with me for not attending church or reading my Bible. He adores me. He’s showing me things outside of these events that are being taken to my core being. He’s showing me how to dream again and to pursue what’s in my heart.

I trust my heart because He lives there.
I trust my heart because His goodness thrives there.
I trust my heart because He has placed dreams within me that belong to only me.
I trust my heart because no matter what happens, I am outrageously loved by the Creator and nothing I do can or will stop that.

There’s something about understanding that His love for us can’t diminish or lessen that blows my mind. He is truly good. Goodness is the core of who He is. He loves without holding back. He can’t help but love because that is who He is! He is flipping LOVE. He can’t not be good. It just won’t happen.

And when we trust this Love that lives in us, there is greatness that flows from us to those around us. And when we trust our hearts, we realize that we are no longer sinners because we were made new the moment we said we wanted to relate to Jesus (Yes, we still make mistakes and have to clean up messes, but it’s no longer in our nature to sin because we have been made new. So stop calling yourself a sinner! You’re saved!). When we trust our hearts, our dreams become a reality because God is bigger than everything and can make ANYTHING happen. Believe me, I’ve seen and heard some cool stuff and that includes resurrection. God is BIG and we can go beyond our questions and fears and tap into that bigness if we choose. Ever seen a leg grow out? I have. Ever hear about cancer being instantly healed? Acne instantly disappearing? Broken bones instantly mending? Depression and mental health issues dissipating? People with paralysis miraculously walking? The blind and deaf seeing and hearing instantly? I have. It’s real, friends. And when we trust our hearts, we allow ourselves to dream BIG because no dream is too big and no dream is too small. Your dream is your dream. If there’s a passion in your heart that needs to be let out, it’s because God created you with it, so let it out. When we trust our hearts, we allow ourselves to risk being open, honest, and vulnerable. Follow your heart. Trust your heart.

I find that most of the time, God is just waiting for me to make a move. He’s already said yes to my dreams, to my heart, to who I am, so it’s my choice to choose where that goes. He’s a big Yes guy. He loves to say yes to your heart! It’s when we choose to only wait for a yes that we miss some things… When I wanted to move to Redding, I didn’t hear a thing from God, but I wanted to do it, so I did. I can’t tell you how much that decision was probably one of the best of my life. If I hadn’t done that, I would have missed out on some valuable puzzle pieces to unanswered questions. Because I trusted my heart, I found things I needed and God opened doors. I took a risk and I partnered with Him and BOOM, goodness happened.

When our hearts are aligned to his and we have trust in it, all things will be worked together for our good.

So, really. Trust. Your. Heart.

What’s it telling you?

1 comment:

  1. Love it. Love you. Uncle Jim and I , as much as would be possible, are sort of in the same places as you. Interesting. We are 'in your corner and rooting for you'... thanks for sharing!

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